Reflections upon Leaving the Kiloby Center

I’ve been working as a facilitator at the Kiloby Center for Recovery since early September 2014. My last two days at the Center are coming up, as my wife and I are moving to be closer to family. I wanted to share some of what I have learned while working at this most wonderful place.

For those of you who feel hopeless, stuck in an endless parade of patterns from which there is seemingly no escape, I do not offer hope. There is a way through, however, and it is the road less travelled. Feel the hopelessness. Welcome it. Love it. Thank it. Appreciate it. Feel it in your body. Give it an invitation to stay as long as it likes. This gives this wave (and it is a wave, not a permanent condition) permission to move and eventually return to the infinite ocean from which it came. Who knows, it may leave gifts as it flows through your being.

We have learned many cutting edge techniques at the Center, some designed to deal directly with the contractions in the body that have been with us from childhood, perhaps very early childhood. Techniques aside, it is our readiness to actually be present to whatever is happening in the body which will alleviate our suffering. It is the exact opposite to what we have learned growing up and throughout our lives, which is, “Oh, you’re feeling something uncomfortable? Well, think positive thoughts instead. You can fix yourself so you never have to feel that feeling again. Maybe reach for something to distract yourself. Partake of some substance or activity to make yourself feel better. This feeling is uncomfortable, so don’t feel it.” For those who still follow that particular programming, the way to end suffering is not around – it is through.

I’ve seen many clients come to the Center and see the value of what is being taught here. They have managed to not only refrain from using when they return home, but through making practical use of what they have learned, have seen great changes emerge in their lives. I use the word emerge deliberately, as it isn’t an efforting that relieves the suffering; it is a relaxing of all the effort we have applied in order not to feel uncomfortable feelings. This allows our true nature to emerge, and we get to watch it permeate our present experience.

Working with Scott, Julianne, Per, Kay, Chad and Paul C. has been a terrific experience. In all this time, I have not witnessed a single instance of anyone losing their composure or behaving in any way that would indicate that they aren’t living authentically. It is a constant reminder to me to notice whatever is happening in my experience and be with it. It has been an honor working with this crew. This goes for all the silly moments also, of which there have been many.

If you’ve ever wondered what it is like to work with Scott, I can say he is a pleasure to be around. He is indeed a very peaceful person, and has a great sense of humor. I am so appreciative of the time spent with him, exchanging ideas and listening to his newly created approaches to helping our clients. His experience, compassion, focus and dedication are readily apparent to all of us.

Julianne, well, I always refer to her as the gold standard when it comes to facilitations. Because of our schedules, I didn’t get to work alongside her very much. But so many times I have heard clients speak of how deep she was able to take them in their inquiries. I’m not surprised. The Center is so fortunate to have her. Plus, she’s great fun to be with, and I’ve so appreciated her support.

I do know that the clients are very aware of the opportunity before them, and most of them have taken advantage of their time at the Center. There are times when I’m speaking with them in a group, or one-on-one, when such love and appreciation for them almost overwhelms me. It takes a certain degree of readiness, but also courage, to come here and face what they have always been running from, and instead turn towards it. Their willingness to do so is inspirational to all of us.

I also wanted to thank my wife, Juliette, whose patience and understanding has afforded me the chance to work creatively with others. I have been so desiring this opportunity, and she has facilitated this for me. I so appreciate her presence in my life.

As for the Living Inquiries and the community, I plan to stay involved, working “electronically” and perhaps with groups and individuals in person. We shall see where this goes.

In the meantime, for all Living Inquiries facilitators and to those who are simply curious about them or involved in any way, know that the home planet, The Kiloby Center for Recovery, is alive and well, and in the best of hands.